Humility is something I desire deeply in my life - both in myself and those around me. Whenever I start to feel a little pride building up, I'm so grateful that just a few minutes in prayer can bring back reality like a smack in the face: Without His grace and mercies afresh each day, I would really be a hot mess. Any accomplishment or achievement that I have attained in life is a GIFT FROM GOD and nothing that I could have done in my own strength or abilities. I'm a train wreck, people, when left to my own devices. I refer to "Exhibit A: My College Years" as proof. And if that's not enough, see also "Exhibit B: Three Years Post College."
I need His guidance and His power and let's be honest, His energy to make through each day. Because for real - no combo of Dr. Pepper, coffee and chocolate could get me through some of the days we've had recently. I need His voice in my head - ok, sometimes it takes a billboard, because let's face it, I'm a bit hard headed at times. But I need His direction and provision for my life. I need to lean into Him and His love and grace to get through the difficult times. I need His reassurance and praise in the happy times. And I also need the constant reminder that...
I am nothing on my own.
The words of one of my favorite songs, Give Us Clean Hands, have become a nearly constant prayer of my heart. I *might* change the plural pronouns to singular personal pronouns and sing it at the top of my lungs driving down the highway. Might.
We bow our hearts.
We bend our knees.
Oh, Spirit come make us humble.
We turn our eyes from evil things.
Oh, Lord we cast out our idols.
And while I don't really have little Buddhas sitting around in our home or a bobble head Buddha on my dash (Although that might be cool! No? Ok.), I do often set up little idols in my heart. My handsome and charming husband. My adorable and hysterical boys. My amazing and loyal friends. My church and community service. My jobs (now down to two! Whoop Whoop!). All the social media scrolling and perusing. Anything really that distracts me from focusing my heart and my energies on Christ. Those become my idols. (And I would be remiss not to take this chance to recommend Kelly Minter's No Other Gods if this is something you want to dig deeper into!)
But I have come to understand, oh-so painfully, that when I turn my eyes away from the Maker of Heaven and Earth, that's when the pride and jealousy and comparison sneak in. And drag me down to place I don't want - or need - to be.
So...(in my best Most Interesting Man in the World voice)...
Stay humble, my friends!