Adoption Update: Almost Two Months In

In case you missed the official sharing of the news last month - we're adopting!

Don't feel "behind" or "left out" if you hadn't heard the news at this point. We're just getting rolling! We've been officially accepted by Lifeline Child Services as well as accepted into their Haiti adoption program. We've filled out a lot of paperwork, written a big check and started reading from the suggested adoptive parent reading list. And now -- you are "in the loop" with us!

Today is a big day in our process though, friends. Jeff and I will be engaging with our case worker (Who is amazing, btw!) in just a few hours for our Orientation Interview. This sounds pretty intimidating, I'll be honest. I have about 2,469,372 questions running though my head coupled with about three times that number of insecurities surrounding being deemed a "good enough" parent to continue this process and well, let's just say that sleep did not come easy last night (Yes, most of this was written in the middle of night. Bless.).

I am sure this conference call will be much less traumatic than I have built it up to be in my (crazy!) head, and that we will hang up feeling even more excited about this process. I'm just sure of it.

So, the significance of this call? This call is the initiation of the home study process. This is about a 4-month process that will create the dossier to be sent to Haiti to match us with our baby girl. It's a BIG, HUGE step, y'all! We are excited about being one step closer to Walton: Party of 5.

I started a journal in November when all this began to really unfold and as I looked back on the first few entries, I can already see God at work in our family - and for our family. Just a few weeks ago, I wrote,

"God is so, so good, sweet one! 

He is already writing a beautiful story for YOU - no matter how it began. 

I pray we can continue to patiently move forward

and surrender the pen to Him daily..." 

Some ways we'd love for you to pray with us on this journey at this point...

• Pray for focus (and stamina!) with the required paperwork for the process. Again, paperwork is NOT my jam, y'all.
• Pray for our boys as the "talk" becomes reality for them and changes their roles in our family. Eli has made it very clear that he does not want to be "the baby" of our family anymore. Just bless.
• Pray for financial provision. We will definitely be letting you know about fundraising opportunities as they are planned! Noonday Collection Trunk Show, anyone?
• Most importantly, pray for our baby girl. We don't know if she is yet to be born, or already living in an orphanage but please, please pray with us for her protection, her family and all those involved in her care until she is home with us.

We covet your prayers and know that without the prayers and support of family and friends, we would not be where we are today with this process. We continue to pray that throughout this entire journey, people see JESUS. Not us or what we do, but JESUS and what He's doing - for us and for her.

Stay tuned...

#AdoptionRocks, Part 3: Four Children from Three Continents

I am so excited to share the Gordon's story! I have watched it unfold and continue to be amazed at their obedience and faith. They have done hard things with grace and love -- and are amazing advocates for the orphan in their community. I am so privileged and blessed to call them "friends." 

When I first met Meaghan, I was visiting Mississippi State University on an interview for a faculty position. She was a bright student just months away from graduating from Miss State and was heading to University of Alabama to pursue a master's degree. I remember that her professors could not say enough good things about her and her future. I could have never imagined just how God would cross our paths again nearly 10 years later. 

Our mutual friend, Kelli, wanted to host a Noonday Collection adoption fundraiser for Meaghan's family as they were working so hard to bring Max home from Ethiopia. We partnered together (with Meaghan's mom hosting at her beautiful home) for an such a fun night -- and we raised nearly $1,000 to help with sweet Max's adoption expenses thanks to the amazing support of the Gordon's family and friends. Who would have guessed there would be several more shows to not only help with Max's expenses, but also to help bring home his baby sister, Mamie, who joined their precious family August 1!

Check out this sweet video the Gordon's church featured on their family's adoption story, and then dive into Meaghan's beautiful reflections on the story God is writing for their little family! 

IN HER OWN WORDS....

My husband Wes and I have been married 10 years this month, and I can promise you that way back in 2005 as we were dreaming and planning of what our lives would look like in 2015, neither of us could have guessed that a decade later we would have four children born on three different continents. But, here we are, and we wouldn’t change a thing!

Two biological kiddos, one born in Ethiopia, and one born in China -- still hard for me to believe that I am blessed to be mom to Mary Reeves, Murphy, Max and Mamie. Adoption is a beautiful, tragic, wonderful, messy, redemptive thing. No matter how they joined our family, our kiddos are so loved and cherished. We pray that the Lord will guide us as we parent our transracial family through added layers of race and culture, loss and gain, and questions that we may never be able to answer. He knit our family together in such a unique way, and we wait expectantly for how He might use our stories to further His kingdom.

We have come through the waiting stage twice…yes, it is hard for families who wait, but oh how much harder for the precious kids who spend their days and nights in orphanages. We have celebrated kissing two of our babies for the first time after many sleepless nights, mountains of paperwork, thousands of prayers, tens of thousands of dollars, and stamps in our passports following flights across the ocean. We have felt the elation of landing at our tiny, local airport to introduce the newest Gordon to a host of family and friends.

Photo by Hayden More Photography
The Gordon Family August 1, 2015

We are now knee deep in cocooning with our littlest (that’s adoption speak for keeping our world small as we transition our precious daughter into our family, language, culture, etc.) We have a whole lifetime of parenting our children ahead of us. We are so thankful for the many little lives we’ve been entrusted with, yet we will forever mourn the missed minutes and milestones with our youngest pair. Their first mothers chose to give life to these miracles, and we will honor them always.

I know now that adoption has so many more layers than I knew about when we filled out our first application in 2011. I LOVE adoption…how it has grown my family and how it has grown me as a person. I love the community and the relationships we have made thanks to adoption. I love supporting adoptive families, and I love companies such as Noonday that provide financial assistance because that can be a huge barrier for many prospective families. We were blessed by the generosity shown our family through several adoption trunk shows held for us over the past several years. Purchasing through these shows helps both the adoptive family and the artisans’ families in vulnerable communities, basically a means of family preservation.

As we approach #WorldAdoptionDay, I remember the birth families, the nannies, the prayer warriors and listening ears, the stylish Noonday wearers, the agency staffs and orphanage directors, the generous family and friends, the casserole deliverers, the medical teams, the church, and everyone else who has played a part in our story. Most of all, I celebrate the precious little boy and little girl who don’t share my DNA but who call me Mommy today. May I live up to that title through the Lord’s leading and encourage others who are walking the same path to parenthood.

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I love the common thread that God is weaving in each of these adoption stories! He loves us, y'all! Like real deal, fights hard for us in dark places, LOVES US! Adoption is such a beautiful pictures of that love - and of His patience with us when we're resistant or unreachable. He waits for us to realize it and then lets us climb right up in His lap and be lavished with it...when we're ready.

Want to read more about the Gordon's journey? Head over to their blog and read more!

Stay tuned, friends! There's more amazingness coming in just a few days!

#AdoptionRocks: In Her Own Words, Part 2

Melissa when we met
in 3rd grade

As I explained in my previous post, I'm featuring an entire month of guest blog posts focused on ADOPTION to help raise awareness for #worldadoptionday November 9. Noonday Collection has a special partnership with adopttogether.org October 1 - November 9 that will  (hopefully) result in hundreds of thousands of dollars being raised for the sole purpose of helping bring children into their forever homes. It makes me want to host adoption fundraisers Every. Single. Day. to make it happen for all these precious children and these amazing families waiting to welcome them home. 

To kick off this amazing month, I cannot think of another person in the world that I would rather have share her adoption story! While we hate to say it this way, she really is one of my oldest friends. I have known Melissa (Head) Humphrey for over 30 years. She quickly became one of my best friends after I moved to Mena, Arkansas, in 3rd grade. We even had best friend pictures made in high school with coordinating outfits and mile-high bangs (I'll save those pictures for another post! You're welcome.). It was - and still is - the real deal friendship that has spanned miles and moves and marriages and children.

Reports of Melissa's earliest days.

Although I've known her for years, Melissa's story is still painful to think about for me - from so many perspectives. She was abandoned by her mother in a green house in Austin, Texas, at just two weeks old. The anguish her mother must have felt to walk away from her precious child, believing that this was the best - or possibly only - choice she had. I can't even, y'all. Then there's the anticipation that Melissa's adoptive parents and older brother must have felt in all those months of waiting for their baby girl to come home. And even now, how as an adult and an amazing mother to her own little boys, all the emotions involved as Melissa continues to process all the information she has since learned about her earliest days...it's just so much.

After her discovery in the greenhouse, Melissa spent 4 months in foster care before finally arriving at home with her amazing parents, who have loved - and continue to love -  her oh-so well. Had it not been for her sweet parents' obedience and faithfulness to respond to the desire God put on their hearts to grow their family through adoption, I would have never had the gift of her friendship.

** An important side note  Melissa's mom still ranks as my ALL-TIME FAVORITE TEACHER! Shout out to Mrs. Head's 5th grade class!

During my recent trip to Dallas, I asked Melissa if she'd be willing to share her story on my blog and her perspective on adoption; I can't wait to share it with you today! Melissa was also asked last year by her church family to share her story as part of their focus on how we are adopted in Christ, and you can watch the video here (And trust me, you want to...grab a tissue!).

IN HER OWN WORDS...

Melissa with her parents, Melba & Joe Head,
on her wedding day.

Adoption is one of my favorite things, because it always saves more than one life. Of course it saves the life of the child, but I’m willing to bet you’d have a hard time finding adoptive parents who would say their lives weren’t also saved by the opportunity to welcome the blessing of a child into their lives.

Adoption is also one of my favorite things because it’s what brought me to my family. Even though I was abandoned as an infant by my birthmother, my adoptive parents chose to have me as part of their family. Actually, it was God who orchestrated it all.

“I was thrust into Your arms at my birth. You have been my God from the moment I was born.” – Psalms 22:10 NLT

Melissa (4 months old), the
day after coming home.
Isn't she the cutest?

My parents and big brother had prayed for a baby for many years, and God said “yes” to their prayers in His perfect timing and placed me in their arms. My birthmother was selfless enough to give me life, and my adoptive parents were selfless enough to give me “a” life.

I really wish there weren’t 101,840 children in foster care, waiting to be adopted (as of 2013). And that’s just in the United States alone! I spent the first four months of my life in a very loving foster home, but that wasn’t where I was meant to stay. God knew exactly where He wanted my forever home to be. Those 101,840 children desperately need forever homes, too.

I also wish there weren’t more than 3,000 American babies killed by abortion every single day (as of 2011). Staggering, huh? An alternate – but also staggering – statistic is that in the U.S., there are approximately two million infertile couples waiting to adopt. After some quick math, supposing that, starting tomorrow, no more abortions took place … at those rates, it would take less than two years for each one of those couples to adopt a baby into their homes and into their hearts. We must look for ways to wrap our arms around these scared, pregnant women, to encourage them, to love them, and to let them know that there’s a better option.

Every child deserves a chance at life – whether inside or outside the womb.

“Don’t you see that children are God’s best gift?” – Psalm 127:3 MSG

Melissa with her husband, Chad, and their precious boys, Carter and Chase.

What can we do about it? To make it even more personal, what can you do about it?

You might be thinking, “I just can’t adopt” or “Those situations don’t apply to me.” But what if – outside of the scenarios described above – there was something you could do? What if you really could make a difference? What about God’s plan for you? What about God’s plan for them? Have you asked Him?

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When I think about Melissa's story, I am so grateful that her birth mother chose LIFE and gave Joe and Melba the chance to love Melissa and give her the home she felt could not provide. Melissa's faith and obedience are such a testament to God's provision for her throughout her life. She is a Godly woman who is an amazing mama to her two funny little boys and loves her husband well. She is the kind of friend we all need in our lives; I'm so thankful God chose Mena, Arkansas, as her home so that our paths crossed and I can call her my friend. 

We each have a role to play in the adoption crisis in our world. You may not feel you've been called to adopt, but maybe your family would be a safe place for a foster child to grow and flourish while he or she waits for a forever home. Maybe you could provide a temporary loving home for a child coming to America for medical treatment. How precious would this gift be to a family separated from their child during this difficult time? 

Maybe you're not ready for those options or maybe just feel you've passed that window in your life. Reality is --> Adoption is expensive, some reaching well over $30,000. I don't know very many - ok, any -  adoptive families who would turn away your financial gift to support their adoption journey.

And y'all. WE CAN ALL PRAY. Pray for the millions of children around the world longing to be loved and cherished -- and just WANTED by someone...anyone. We can pray for the adoptive families as they wait: for peace in their hearts, smooth transitions into their homes and even financial provision.

Wherever you are with this situation, every Christ-follower has a responsibility to care for the orphan (Head to James 1:27, if you need to SEE it!). I ask you to earnestly seek His face over these next few weeks as you read these amazing stories and consider how He is calling YOU to respond -- and then ACT.

Stay tuned for the next post from my sweet friend, Meaghan! She and her husband have recently grown their family through adoption a second time and have such a beautiful family!

#AdoptionRocks: Part 1

I am so stinkin' excited about what's coming to my blog in the next few weeks! I cannot wait to share this little sneak peek with you today!

Over the last few years, I feel like my eyes have been opened and my heart broken for the orphan crisis in the world. While our family has started down the adoption path a few times to have God gently close those doors (for now...I'm persistent, friends!), I know He has called me (for now) to an advocacy role. He has asked me to use my voice and my Noonday Collection business to support other adoptive families who are pursuing both domestic and international adoption. When I work with a hostess for an adoption fundraiser show, I donate at least 10% of my commission from the show's sales to the family's adoption expenses - essentially doubling the donation made by Noonday Collection. THIS is my role (again, for now. Wink. Wink.).

As we approach #WorldAdoptionDay November 9, I am excited to be a part of a unique partnership between Noonday Collection and adopttogether.org that will (hopefully!) result in hundreds of thousands of dollars being donated to adoptive families around the country. 

But I wanted to do more with the opportunity presented this month. So, for the next few weeks, I'm featuring some amazing stories of adoption on my blog. Stories written by friends, and a few by complete strangers, that are amazing examples of faith and perseverance and obedience. Stories that I hope will inspire you and encourage you to ACT on behalf of the orphan (James 1:27, if you need a Biblical nudge.). Stories written IN HER OWN WORDS...

So, maybe you're reading this thinking, "What can I possibly do?" Well, I'm glad you asked because I have a few suggestions...

1) Pray. We can all pray. We can pray for discernment about our specific role, but we can also pray for the millions of children around the world longing to be loved. And the millions of families "stuck" in the adoption process and waiting to love them. We can pray for comfort and provision for these precious children until they are brought into loving homes. We can pray for peace, endurance and financial provision for the families working tirelessly to bring them home.

2) Be informed. Take time to connect with organizations that advocate for the orphan and make an effort to understand the current situation - not only in the big, wide world but in YOUR world. What are the statistics for your state? Your county? One of my favorite organizations is Show Hope and this is a great first bite into understanding the current situation. Being informed is also a great way to be an advocate for others and to speak truth and encouragement to others walking the adoption journey. 

3) Give. You can donate directly to an adoptive family, or you can participate in a myriad of creative fundraisers that most adoptive families use to raise funds: garage sales, t-shirt sales, direct sales shows (like Noonday Collection) where a portion of sales is donated to the family, crowd sourcing websites, etc... Every gift/purchase matters, dear friends. Don't dismiss your participation or support because it doesn't "feel like enough" - sometimes just knowing that there are people out there pulling for you and your family during this difficult and trying time means the most. 

Source: Show Hope

4) Consider fostering. This needs a post of its own as there are so many ins and outs involved in this process - many specific from state-to-state. But maybe this is where God is calling you -- to provide a safe landing place for a child who is waiting for his or her forever home. And you may find the foster-to-adopt option works for you and your family. Check your state's requirements and prayerfully consider this option. 

5) Adoption. This is not for the faint of heart, sweet friends. It is not a decision to be taken lightly or jumped into. As my guest bloggers will share over the next few weeks, there are so many factors to consider (and sooooo much paperwork. Sorry - that is NOT my jam!). I can't wait to share the beauty that comes in this process though! He is faithful in our  obedience!

So, will you walk with me through these next few weeks and read these beautiful stories of hope and redemption? Adoption is such a beautiful picture of salvation, and I think that's why my heart is so encouraged by its beauty. In my sin, I am broken and isolated and felt so unloved and unwanted. But God sent His Son to rescue me - to show me the ultimate example of love ALL FOR ME...and then lovingly, He took me in, with no regard for my past. He loves me through the anger and the hurt and the shame caused my past and continues to pour out His grace and mercy on me each day as we grow together in fellowship. 

Come with me on this journey. Enjoy these stories and prayerfully consider: What is YOUR role in the orphan crisis? Have you asked God what He wants and NEEDS you to do to bring HOPE to dark places around the world? Are you willing to ACT when He responds?

25 Days...and Counting

Anse-a-Pitre, Haiti : May 2013

In 25 days, I'll be headed back to Haiti and the DR for about 10 days. When I look back at the last 18 months of my life, I stand amazed. What I believed to be a "bucket list" kind of adventure to Haiti has turned my world upside down.

My heart has been broken for a tiny island in the Caribbean that 3 1/2 years ago, I very likely could not have found on a map without some serious searching. I own a sewing machine that has only sewn school kit bags because there was a chance that those bags might end up in the hands of Haitian children. I have learned more about the creation of sustainable income streams and building clean water wells than I ever dreamed possible for this non-math, non-science minded girl. And I have changed my entire career path to answer a call to do something - however small it may feel - to make lives better and share the love of Jesus Christ in this little part of the world.

Wow. Who knew? 

God did.

I have, on several occasions lately, played the "what if" game. My faith is so weak, despite the overwhelming blessings God pours out on me, and I have a tendency to second-guess decisions...often. 

• What if I hadn't gone to Haiti in June 2012? 
• What if I hadn't gone back in February when Tim Dortch, HMM Founder and Director, said about a million times, "Communication is 90% of what we do!"? 
• What if my sweet husband - at any point - had not been supportive? 
• What if my family and friends hadn't generously supported my trips and our entire team in May to make these trips financially possible?
• What if my fears had gotten the best of me?

Anse-a-Pitre, Haiti :
June 2012

There are so many pieces and parts that have been carefully orchestrated to bring me to being 25 days from my fourth trip to Haiti in 15 months (Note: I did not even have a passport until two years ago). It makes my head spin a little when I think about it...ok, a lot. 

But I don't believe in coincidence...I believe God has gone before me every step of this journey. I believe He has made situations that seemed impossible - possible. 

The biggest "what if" I have struggled with lately has been, "What if I had said "No, not me. Not now."? Then, of course, my mind wanders to all the times when I have said that. 

I am ashamed and so sad...the times are too numerous to count. And there are probably so many times I don't even realize I have missed.

I think I'd rather just count the days until I leave...

Why Noonday? Why now?

To say that I have gotten some funny looks over the last few weeks as I've shared my excitement about becoming a Noonday Collection ambassador might be an understatement. There's not a lot of room on my plate, so to speak, and I know people are thinking, "Why in the world would you take on one more thing?"

In short - it's because of the world. 

We're only here for a little while (thank goodness!) and I was blessed to have been born in one of the wealthiest and most influential nations in the world. Why shouldn't I use my resources (time, energy, money and social capital) to help those without access to resources to help themselves? Noonday Collection is empowering entire communities by creating jobs for skilled artisans and providing training unskilled artisans. I can help from Smalltown, USA not only by selling the Noonday Collection products, but by sharing these artisans' stories in hopes of motivating others to be more mindful and deliberate in their purchases.

So, no. I don't have time but I am choosing to make time because I believe in the good Noonday is doing. And, quite simply, we are commanded to help others (Matthew 25:40).

Yes, it does take time away from my own family. However, many of the artisans Noonday supports have been on the brink of putting children in orphanages because they simply could not provide for them. So if I can spend a few hours a week at a trunk show to help keep families together, then I think the sacrifice will be worth it.

If you've been one of the 'funny looks' people or had those thoughts, it's ok. I understand and admit there have been moments of "What am I doing!?" But I hope as you learn more about Noonday, you'll want to become part of the story. Purchase a product (or two!) Maybe host a trunk show? Who knows, maybe you'll even decide to join the amazing ladies (and one brave man!) who make up the Noonday Collection team!

You can purchase directly from the Noonday Collection site or you can attend a trunk show in your area - or host one yourself and receive FREE products!

"...when you satisfy the needs of the oppressed, your night will become like the noonday." Isaiah 58:10

Happies!

I went shopping.

For those of you that know me, this is probably not really earth-shattering news.

But this trip was amazing! I went to buy happies to take to the kids! It was so fun to shop and think about their reactions. I bought bubbles, a few jump ropes, some Nerf balls, Matchbox cars and a construction vehicle set, and some hair pretties for the girls. I have several friends bringing things for me to pack as well and I'm pretty sure I'll be leaving out some clothes to stay under my 50 lbs of luggage...and I'm ok with that.

It was a fun trip, but the best part was coming home with the loot and talking to Riley about it. Of course, he really wanted those Matchbox cars for himself, but was more than willing to give them up after we talked about the boys who would get them that may not have any cars. We even prayed over the toys with him that night at bedtime, and he has since mentioned "the children who will get those toys" in several other prayers. While he will likely grow up never having to want for anything, I pray he is learning to have compassion and a heart to help those who aren't as blessed...

Today's prayer requests:

1. The children who will receive the team's gifts. Pray that they will enjoy the fun, but also that their joy and happiness will come from a relationship with our Heavenly Father and last much longer than these trinkets.

2. The parents of these children. Pray that they will see God's love in our actions and affections for their children and they will also come to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.

Three more days...

Haiti Bound

Disclaimer: This post has nothing to do with running...

It's official.

On June 10, I will be leaving for a 7-day mission trip to Haiti. We will be flying into the Dominican Republic and then traveling by bus to Pedernales. We'll be bussed across the border each day to work in small Haitian community. There will be a medical team as well as a construction team and the goal is to build two house and one classroom (or vise versa) during our stay. 

I have been praying for Haiti and its people since the terrible earthquake in January 2010 and began praying in January 2011 for an opportunity to participate in a Haitian mission trip. I never expected the opportunity to come so quickly, nor did I expect to be traveling with a group of people I don't even know (will post this story later!). But God is faithful to answer our prayers...even in unexpected ways. 

I have gotten mixed reactions from family and friends about my trip. While I do understand the concerns - both for my own safety and about leaving my family - there is no doubt in my mind that God has called me to serve in this country. If I do not go, I am being disobedient. And if I say, "Wait - it's not time," I am also being disobedient. Thus, I am going now...and again if He calls me to do so. I am confident He will bless my obedience because that's what He promises...

"And we know that God causes everything to work together

for the good of those who love God 

and are called according to His purpose for them." 

Romans 8:28 (NLT)

I am seeking prayer partners who will commit to pray for our team in the coming months and  while we are away. If you are willing to do so, please let me know.