I am such a freak about goals (and actually attaining them!) that I felt like a big, huge failure for weeks. I am still pretty sad about this failure (ok, I'm pretty sure I suffered from temporary depression...is that possible?).
But, just as He always does, God showed me the bigger picture of my failure. And that is this: There are some things in my life that I simply cannot put ahead of training and I was racing toward that line pretty quickly (running pun not intended). My relationship with Him and service to Him, loving my husband, raising my sweet boys, and keeping my job MUST be the priorities on a seemingly never-ending "to do" list. The 26.2 medal is an "earthly treasure" (see Matthew 6:19-21) and my heart was longing for that more than other things. Ok. I get it now.
So, I have my priorities in check now (well, most days anyway!). I will run when I can and do my best to make time for it, but I will not stress about it... it kind of defeats one of my main purposes for running if I stress about it.
Will I ever have time to train for a marathon? I hope so, but my boys will be older and my job situation a little more secure before I try again. Until then, when I get discouraged about my running failure(s), I will cling to 1 Corinthians 9:24-25...
24 Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. 25 Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.