The Game of Life

Spin the wheel. Move your sporty little car down the game of life trail. Draw two cards and chose between them for your career...and then change it on down the road if it's not working out for you. Add a baby...or four with another spin. Buy or sell a house on a whim. Learn to play the bongos or maybe take dancing lessons. Not enough money to pay your debts? No problem - just take out a bank loan. My personal favorite: Get $20K just because someone else spun your "magic number." 


I grew up playing Life with my family. I'd load up that little pink car with all my kids - I always got the pink car because I was the only girl, btw. I'd stash my loads of cash neatly under the edge of the playing board just waiting and saving. It all seemed so simple. Pick this or that. Lucky break here -- get $500K. Be a teacher -- and make $100,000 a year. (Maybe the game should be called "Dreamland" instead!). Hit a streak of bad luck -- lose your money. But no worries -- payday is just a spin away!

Riley got the newest version of LIFE for his birthday, and we've been enjoying a little family game night (when we're not running crazy to "all the things"). Although Riley's version has been updated from my 1980s version, not much has really changed about the concept. As I watched the boys' excitement wax and wane, I couldn't help but be just a little sad, too. I wish I could make the real game of life that simple for them. What if they only had TWO careers to choose from -- with both netting them over $100K a year? What if choosing the right spouse was as simple as selecting a colored peg and plopping her into the car beside them (not to mention getting $20K wedding gifts from everyone else playing!). 

If I'm being honest, thinking about their futures sometimes make my mama heart hurt a little at the thought of their wrong choices and inevitable detours ahead in each of their lives. I want to protect them. Maybe just wrap their little blue car with some bubble wrap to prevent the dings and dents or even head-on collisions. Or maybe just tell them which girl is "the one" (and certainly tell them which ones are NOT!) or help them choose the best career for them. 

But I can't, really.

If I'm being realistic, all I can do is try to teach them to love Jesus and pray. I think back on all the times my parents tried to steer me in the right direction and at how I so often balked and did just the opposite. Sometimes it worked out for me - and sometimes it didn't...but there were certainly lots of dings along the way.

I've decided that watching your child hurt, whether physically or emotionally, because of a bad choice must be the worst part of parenting. I don't look forward to it. At. All. Even the few "little" situations we've had already were just awful.

So I pray daily for their safety and their protection from the hard knocks that are certain to come. I pray for their decisions and for the friends they will surround themselves with in the years to come. I pray for God to draw their hearts to Him and when they stray, protect them until they return to Him. I pray I can show them Jesus in real ways that make them want to love Him - and love others because of Him. Most of all, I pray for mercy and grace for all the mistakes I will make along the way.


Will I still try to tell them what to do? Probably. Will they listen? Probably not. After all, they did get a double dose of the stubborn gene, unfortunately. Will I love them and support them either way? Absolutely! 

Because really,  I can't wrap them (or their little hearts) in bubble wrap. And Jeff and I really only have them for a short time...we just have to remember that it's what we do with that short time makes all the difference in the game of ETERNAL LIFE.

Sidewalk Prophets has a song, "The Words I Would Say" that sums it up pretty well, I think...

Be strong in the Lord 

and never give up hope.

You're gonna do great things, 

I already know. 

God's got His hand on you 

so don't live life in fear.

Forgive and forget,

but don't forget why you're here.

Take your time and pray...

These are the word I would say. 

So, what are your parenting fears? How do you handle your worries about the future?

Parenting is HARD, Y'all!

Parenting is hard, y'all. Like crazy hard. And there are no cliff notes, cheat sheets or short cuts. There's no borrowing your friend's notes who had the class before you...because Lord knows, the test is going to be different. Parenting is the cramming-all-night-for-days-at-a-time-and-praying-something-sticks-for-test-day kind of hard. We've planning for the boys' college funds, but it might also be wise to start putting a little aside for therapy because I'm certain I'm messing them up somehow. 

NOTE: Now would probably be an appropriate time to apologize to my own parents for all the pain and agony I caused them growing up...who am I kidding - that I'm still causing them!

Seriously though. Parenting is probably the most difficult thing I've ever done...and my boys are just seven and four. For goodness sakes, we haven't even hit the teen years. And I think one thing that makes parenting so difficult is that there is no end. With a project or a task or a renovation or whatever else it is you're tackling, there's an end. A clearly defined moment when you can step back and declare (hopefully, triumphantly!) "IT IS FINISHED!" But I think we'll be parenting in some form or fashion until we reach those pearly gates. 

And I'll be honest, there are moments when I think I can't possibly answer one more question or pick up one more toy or match one more pair of socks. My fruit of the spirit basket is just plain empty, y'all...and it feels like the off-season for all things fruity. I can't possibly intervene in one more argument or explain why it's not ok to leave  dirty dishes in the sink one more time. Wait - that last one is for the "Marriage is hard, y'all!" post! #loveyouhoney

But then - in the midst of the chaos and crazy - God moments happen. There are little glimpses of heaven in their smiles or their laughs or the kind words they say or the compassionate acts I am blessed enough to see. They happen when I least expect them and oftentimes I miss them until later when I'm falling into bed reflecting on the day. But they are there.

A few nights ago, we were herding our little buffalo to bed - and well past a respectable bedtime for a seven and four year old, mind you. I had been "working from home" <insert hysterical laughter here> with the boys most of the day. We'd been to eat dinner where their table manners and overall behavior left much to be desired. And then - just because I am totally insane and like to torture myself - I thought a "quick" trip to pick up a "few things" at the grocery store would be a good idea. Oh my stars! By the time we reached the checkout, I was ready offer them to the next person who commented on "how cute" they were. I'm kidding...mostly.

Thankfully, I was able to sneak away to run a few miles before the sun went down to recompose myself as we made our final approach toward bedtime. But by the time we actually started toward the bed, everyone was in a funk...and I do mean EVERYONE and I do mean FUNK.

I finally got Riley into bed. He could tell I was exasperated...he's smart like that.

Riley: "Mom, I don't want to cuddle tonight."

Me: "What? Why? Are you pouting because you got in trouble?"

Riley: "No...I just don't deserve to get to cuddle."

<Insert mama's heart breaking here.>

What an amazing moment to teach Riley what GRACE looks like...to cuddle that sweet baby boy until he pushes me away (because he's starting to do that now, you know). And to let him know that no amount of terrible table manners, smart-mouthed back talking or bullying his little brother could make me love him any less or want to lavish any fewer cuddles on him. Cuddles at bedtime are an act of love - of me expressing my love for him - and his behavior doesn't change my love for him (just my blood pressure!). Cuddles are the good stuff that end a long day and make all the yuck and the craziness from it disappear. Cuddles are the unspoken "I love you" that we all need sometimes. Cuddles are the bomb, y'all.

The really cool thing about that moment? If I feel that way about him...isn't it mind blowing to think about how much more our heavenly Father wants to pour out His amazing and unconditional love on us? Overwhelming to think about the joy He finds in giving us fantastic blessings - undeserved blessings?

So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children,

how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him.

Matthew 7:11 (NLT)

So bring on those cuddles, sweet Jesus! Wrap me up in Your arms and let Your grace wash over me when I've been a terrible mom/wife/daughter/sister/aunt/friend/person in general. Let me know that YOU still love me - even when I don't deserve it. Cuddle me until I am secure in Your love and know You are sovereign over all the yuck and are working Your blessings into my mess in Your time. Thank you, Lord, for these wild little boys...and for the lessons they bring.

Oh, the parenting lessons! They are really God lessons...perfectly disguised in little boys with no manners or concept of acceptable voice volume.

Has God given you a lesson through the little people in your life? I'd love for you to share it in the comments!

Back to School Time

In just a few days, classes will begin at MSU and the reality of not being in the classroom as either a student or a professor for the first time...well, since I was about 4 - is about to hit me smack upside the head (And for those of you doing the math, STOP. It's not THAT many years!).

I have no idea how I'm going to feel. I like to think I'll be relieved, and even a little grateful - no grading, no class prep, no grading, no faculty meetings, no grading, no advising, no grading...you get the point. 

In reality though, I am sure I'm going to be a little sad. I'm going to miss meeting new students. I'm going to miss trying to challenge them. I'm going to miss those "Ah-ha!" moments where it all comes together. I'm going to miss drop by visits from students who have since become friends. I'm going to miss being mistaken for a student...ok, that doesn't happen as often as it used to, but I'm still going to miss it.

Don't get me wrong! I'm excited about the HMM gig and the countdown is on until I leave for my next trip (one month, if you're curious), but as I've mentioned before, I crave routine and really like comfort. I haven't gotten into my routine with this new role...and very likely won't as everyday seems to hold a new set of challenges.

Kindergarten...1981. 

So for all you going back to school, quit your whining and for Pete's sake, ENJOY IT! Sniff those new pencils and savor the look of a spiral notebook with no stragglers hiding in the wires. Take those selfies in the mirror before you leave or endure your overzealous parents' attempts at capturing first day memories! Just hold the sign and smile for them, will ya?!

Cherish each minute - good or bad - because one day, you'll miss buying new pencils and notebooks and the excitement of picking out your first-day-of-school outfit. One day, the first day of school will be just another day...

And then there's school picture day...the sign is not so bad, right?

Would love to hear some of YOUR favorite parts of the back-to-school season!

Top 10 at 35

So, today is my birthday - my 35th birthday, but who's counting at this point, right? I decided to do a Top 10 things I would like to tell a younger me. Here goes:

10.  Ordering pizza and eating Waffle House at 2 a.m. will eventually catch up with you. Go to bed and study during "normal" hours, college girl.

9.  The tan you're rocking is great, but in a few years, you'll be wishing you had all that money you spent on the "unlimited" tanning packages back and instead, had spent it on sunscreen.

8.  "I'm-pregnant-so-I-can-eat-whatever-I-want" for nine months (times two!) is not going to work out like you are hoping. Put down the doughnut holes and go for a walk.

7.  One day, you will appreciate being carded. Enjoy it while it lasts, sister!

6.  Not eating vegetables because your mom wants you to is NOT a sign of rebellion. You're just being stupid. Eat up and your body will thank you for it.

5.  Putting off exercise for a few hours is oftentimes ok. Putting off exercise for 15 years is not. Get up and get moving.

4.  All those boys you think are "the one" and that you're trying so hard to impress are not and you're wasting a lot of time and energy. Boys are gross - at any age.

3.  Your parents are right about most things. You should stop being such a jerk to them and actually listen to their advice. It might save you some heartache, stubborn.

2.  The t-shirt you got for signing up for a credit card will be one of the most expensive "free gifts" you've ever received. Walk on by the cute boy at the table and laugh at his sign because it says "Free Gift" - and that's redundant.

1.  Most of the things that you are stressing about right now, you won't even be able to remember in 15 years. Chill out.

There you have it! Happy 35th birthday to me - and 65th to my dad! He says I'm the most expensive present he's ever gotten. I like to say - I'm his gift that just keeps on giving!